Bananas.org - Adults Only Humor

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Re: Adults Only Humor

The Three Stages OF A Man's Life

SINGLE

MARRIED

DIVORCED

Sorry guys, but the 2nd pic made me ROAR laughing:ha::ha::ha:

Re: Adults Only Humor

The American Government funded a study to see why the head of a man's penis was larger than the shaft. After 1 year and $180,000, they concluded that the reason that the head was larger than the shaft was to give the man more pleasure during sex.

After the US published the study, the French decided to do they're own study. After $250,000 and 3 years of research, they concluded that the reason the head was larger than the shaft was to give the woman more pleasure during sex.

Australians, unsatisfied with these findings, conducted their own study. After 2 weeks, a cost of around $75.46, and 2 cases of beer, they concluded that it was to keep a man's hand from flying off and hitting himself in the forehead.

Re: Adults Only Humor

Quote:

Originally Posted by Patty in Wisc (Post 78876)

I think it's true cos otherwise there will be an enormous number of swollen headed teen age boys growing into big swollen headed adults.....with permanent black eyes, broken noses, smashed teeth....partial blindness due to ruptured eyeballs...:ha::ha::ha::ha::ha::ha::ha:

Re: Adults Only Humor

A good comeback...

A man was sunbathing naked at the beach. For the sake of civility, and to keep it from getting sunburned, he had a hat over his private parts.

A woman walks past and says, snickering, "If you were a gentleman you'd lift your hat."

He raised an eyebrow and replied, "If you weren't so ugly it would lift itself."

Re: Adults Only Humor

A young man is walking a tightrope between 2 huge skyscrapers

Another young man has a 90 year old lady with her head between his legs, dentures out & going to Town

Both men are thinking the same thing
What are they thinking?

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Don't look down
Don't look down

Re: Adults Only Humor

Diary of a man.....

1. When I was born, I got a choice - A big dick or a good memory. I'm unable to remember what I chose.

2. Your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory.

3. A wife is a sex object. Every time you ask for sex, she objects.

4. Impotence: It's nature's way of saying "no hard feelings".

5. There are only two four letter words that are offensive to men - "don't" and "stop"; unless they are used together.

6. Panties are not the best thing on earth, but next to the best thing on earth.

7. There are three stages to sex in a person's life: Tri Weekly, Try Weekly, and Try Weakly.

8. Virginity can be cured.

9. Virginity is not dignity; it's a lack of opportunity.

10. Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.

11. I tried phone sex once, but the holes in the dialer were too small.

12. Marriage is the only war where you get to sleep with the enemy.

13. Q: What's an Australian kiss? A: The same thing as a French kiss; only down under.

14. A newly married couple were happy with the "whole thing". He was happy with the Hole and she was happy with the Thing!

15. Q: What are the three biggest tragedies in a man's life? A: Life sucks, job sucks and the wife doesn't.

16. Q: What's the difference between a bitch and a whore? A: A whore sleeps with everyone at the party and a bitch
sleeps with everyone except you.

17. Q: Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact ? A: Breasts don't have eyes.

18. Of course you've heard about the Viagra computer virus; it turns your 3 1/2 inch floppy into a hard disk.

19. Despite the old saying, "Don't take your troubles to bed", many men still sleep with their wives!!!

Re: Adults Only Humor

Boobs in Church

There was this small church down in Texas that had a very big-busted organist. Her breasts were so huge that they bounced and jiggled while she played the organ. Unfortunately, she distracted the congregation considerably. The very proper church ladies were appalled. They said something had to be done about this or they would have to get another organist.

So, one of the ladies approached her very discreetly and told her to mash up some green persimmons and rub them on the nipples of her breasts and maybe they would shrink in size, but warned her not to eat any of the green persimmons, though, 'because they are so sour they will make your mouth pucker up and you won't be able to talk properly for a while'.

She agreed to try it.

The following Sunday morning the minister got up in the pulpit and said...

'Dew to thircumsthanthis bewond my contwol, we will not hath a thermon tewday.'

Re: Adults Only Humor

Two guys walking down a street noticing a dog licking himself. One guy said "geeze, I wish I could do that". The other guy said "I tried that once and the dog bit me".

Re: Adults Only Humor

A man is in bed with his Thai girlfriend.

After having great sex, she spends the next hour just stroking his tool, something she had lovingly done on many occasions.

Rather enjoying it, he turns and asks her, "Why do you love doing that?"

She replies: "Because I really miss mine".

Re: Adults Only Humor

Musa 'Florida Variegate' from Thailand. I wanted to post a pic when it first arrived, but thought it was too nasty looking. If I had thought of it then, I would have posted on this thread.
:D

Re: Adults Only Humor

Here's one our dear friend Tog would have enjoyed:

YouTube - Cialis spoof

Re: Adults Only Humor

Pete, where do the batteries go??

Re: Adults Only Humor

Quote:

Originally Posted by Patty in Wisc (Post 80709)

Pete, where do the batteries go??

I think that this one is a hand job. No batteries required.

Re: Adults Only Humor

wonder if cialis would work on "producing " more nanas???

Re: Adults Only Humor

Quote:

Originally Posted by mskitty38583 (Post 80747)

wonder if cialis would work on "producing " more nanas???

Only if You decide the time is right, as life has it's little interuptions.:bananas_b isn't that what the commercial says?

Re: Adults Only Humor

LOLOLOLOLOLOL!:ha::ha::ha:

Re: Adults Only Humor

I give you "Lycopersicon mammilliform". :ha::ha::ha:

Re: Adults Only Humor

A little boy says to his mother, " Mommy, how come I'm black and you're white?"
His mother replied, "Don't even go there! From what I can remember about that party, you're lucky you don't bark!