sunfish

OLD LADIES HOTEL BILL An elderly lady decided to give herself a big treat for her significant birthday by staying overnight in one of London's most expensive hotels. When she checked out next morning, the desk clerk handed her a bill for $250.00. She exploded and demanded to know why the charge was so high. "It's a nice hotel but the rooms certainly aren't worth $250.00 for just an overnight stop without even breakfast." The clerk told her that $250.00 is the 'standard rate' so she insisted on speaking to the Manager. The Manager appeared and forewarned by the desk clerk announced: "The hotel has an Olympic-sized pool and a huge conference center which are available for use." "But I didn't use them," she said. "Well, they are here, and you could have," explained the Manager. He went on to explain that she could also have seen one of the in-hotel shows for which the hotel is famous. "We have the best entertainers from Edinburgh, Glasgow, and Aberdeen performing here," the Manager said. "But I didn't go to any of those shows," she said. "Well, we have them, and you could have," the Manager replied. No matter what amenity the Manager mentioned, she replied, "But I didn't use it!" The Manager was unmoved, so she decided to pay, wrote a check and gave it to the Manager. The Manager was surprised when he looked at the check. "But madam, this check is only made out for $50.00." "That's correct. I charged you $200.00 for sleeping with me," she replied. "But I didn't!" exclaims the very surprised Manager.. "Well, too bad, I was here, and you could have." Don't mess with Old Ladies!!!