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Old 04-30-2014, 07:36 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Default What Cracked up you up Today?

I went the the Base Page and saw "BeerFarts".. enough said.. :^)
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Old 04-30-2014, 07:45 AM   #2 (permalink)
 
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Ad or new member? I missed it. Darn.
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Old 04-30-2014, 08:02 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Quote:
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Ad or new member? I missed it. Darn.
a newer Member.. :^)
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Old 04-30-2014, 10:18 AM   #4 (permalink)
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Old 04-30-2014, 03:35 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Old 04-30-2014, 04:14 PM   #6 (permalink)
 
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Default Re: What Cracked up you up Today?

I have been very, very good. I started plants; I'm finding homes for spares. Grudgingly--they're my babies! Several years without dirt or many possessions has helped me with my collecting addictions but I know I'll never be totally cured. It did help that I planted old seeds. I only purchased marigolds, Swiss chard and cucumbers but refrained from planting entire packages. It wasn't self restraint; I didn't have enough cells or space and was ordered to not make "messy" newspaper pots. It doesn't help that I have 2 long time gardeners "champing at the bit" to share treasures with me. Help!

ETA: I went to look at a little house today. Holy cow! There were 4 trees right beside it; 1 was growing through the front roof overhang and another was into the siding. It was apparent that someone had gardened there--pots of all sizes strewn about in the backyard. Tempted as I was to collect the bounty, I settled for a twig from a very old and sad looking fig. (I'd have clipped more but they were really tough.) I figure 4 starts from that one.

Yeah, I'm sick!
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Old 04-30-2014, 06:11 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Default Re: What Cracked up you up Today?

I need some of these to hangout w/ my hanging monkey.. :^)

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Old 04-30-2014, 07:09 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Default Re: What Cracked up you up Today?

Around my pond today, heard a frog croaking nonstop almost! Looked all around because I knew it had to be right in front of me... And it was... This thing must have had a death wish, broad daylight.


I took a lot of up-close photos, it was not even a little scared of me.
We had multiple small showers today and it stayed comfortably warm.
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Old 04-30-2014, 10:26 PM   #9 (permalink)
 
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"Baby you are finer than a new set of snow tires" That reminded me of a hitchhiker I
picked up quite a few years ago. When he got into the car I noticed, that his knuckles
were bleeding. He explained: "I was fighting with five guys, who kidnapped my wife. If I
could get her back, I would pay one hundred dollars. (pause) And you know, she is worth
it"
That cracked me up.


Olaf
PS: $100.- would not have bought a new set of snow tires, even then.


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Old 05-01-2014, 12:43 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Old 05-01-2014, 11:03 PM   #11 (permalink)
 
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Default Re: What Cracked up you up Today?

I read and listened to a Facebook post where a guy had a piano in his yard and he was playing it. The female elephant danced. The male elephant and the guy played the piano and the elephant occasionally bleated. Once they were done, the male elephant high-fived his human friend.
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Old 05-02-2014, 06:26 PM   #12 (permalink)
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I need some of these.. :^)

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Old 05-02-2014, 08:15 PM   #13 (permalink)
 
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Growing up in the DC area, I had to learn how to parallel park properly (PDQ) or face a ticket if I wasn't perfectly spaced from the curb.

Stop me if I've told this here...okay, you can't...sorry.

On May 8th, the exact day I could go test for my DL after turning 16 because I had to have a learner's permit for 15 days which I couldn't get in person but only by mail and couldn't apply for until my 16th BD on 4/13...thus the lapse.

This was not some flat parking lot test but on the road and actually on hills in Kensington, MD. I had the choice of 2 family cars for my test: the Ford station wagon or the little Valiant. The Ford was huge but automatic; the Valiant was 3 on the tree I'd driven 3 times briefly with my father and I had stalled on hills with him, which, in those days was an automatic fail.

I chose the Ford.

I, using my hopefully about to be dead learner's, drove my mother to the test site. Written test? Scored 96%. Next step? Parallel parking at the police station. In a boat. Yikes!

The cop administering my test walked me to the cruise ship, got in, wrote a few things down, told me to start the engine, directed me to pull up to where the 2 cones of potential failure were located and then said. "Lunch" as he opened the passenger door and got out.

I spent 10 minutes maneuvering the mother ship into perfect position then went down the street with Mom to try "lunch". She had a sandwich; I bit my nails.

Came back early. My test administrator opened the door, asked me to turn on the engine and commanded me to park. One turn of the wheel while gently backing up (watching all mirrors) and I was done. He opened the door, looked down and said "Let's go!"

The hills were a piece of cake; I didn't stall once. I had Mom drive home; I was too antsy.

I can park a manual like a champ these days and only stall on hills if the clutch is slipping or it's new ride for me. I like little cars.
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Old 05-02-2014, 09:37 PM   #14 (permalink)
 
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Default Re: What Cracked up you up Today?

It’ll be more fun, Migael, if you print this on slips, which resemble parking
tickets in your town and slip those under the windshield wiper.





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Old 05-05-2014, 11:51 AM   #15 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by A942533 View Post
I read and listened to a Facebook post where a guy had a piano in his yard and he was playing it. The female elephant danced. The male elephant and the guy played the piano and the elephant occasionally bleated. Once they were done, the male elephant high-fived his human friend.
That was pretty good.. Elephant was getting its groove on.. :^)

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Old 05-05-2014, 04:41 PM   #16 (permalink)
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Old 05-06-2014, 04:15 PM   #17 (permalink)
 
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Default I know, what she is up against

An elderly lady is stopped by a young cop: "Do you know that you were speeding?"

She with a bright smile: "Yes, but I have to get there before I forget, where I am going."

The officer put his ticket book away and bid her good day.

Makes perfectly good sense to me!!


I am almost there myself ,

Olaf



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Old 05-06-2014, 06:27 PM   #18 (permalink)
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Smile Re: What Cracked up you up Today?

The middle part of my log bridge collapsed when I was walking over it.
Har-di har...
.
image
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Old 05-06-2014, 08:52 PM   #19 (permalink)
 
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Hi Mike,

I cannot make out any leftovers of a collapsed log bridge, but I do not have to,
since it is clear anyway, that you have to go on a diet

Good luck, with rebuilding, whatever collapsed

Olaf





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Old 05-08-2014, 10:30 PM   #20 (permalink)
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Default Re: What Cracked up you up Today?

If I saw this in the store I'd be rollin' on the floor dyeing.. :^)

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