Banana Jokes!

MediaHound · 07-10-2005, 10:35 PM

Q: Why do bananas wear suntan lotion?
A: Because they peel!

JoeReal · 07-20-2005, 11:32 AM

Q: What is Beethoven's favorite fruit?
A: (sing to the tune of 5th symphony): Banana..na....! Banana..na....!
http://w3.rz-berlin.mpg.de/cmp/beethoven_sym5_1.wav

bananalover · 08-03-2005, 06:37 PM

What do you call two banana skins?

A pair of slippers

JoeReal · 08-04-2005, 02:52 PM

Q: When banana growers are heart broken, what do they sing?

A:What else but Peelings?

Peelings, nothing more than peelings,
trying to forget my peelings of love.
Teardrops rolling down on my face,
trying to forget my peelings of love....

Adapted from song of Morris Albert's Feelings.

JoeReal · 08-04-2005, 02:54 PM

Why did the banana go to see the doctor?

The banana was not peeling very well.

MediaHound · 08-04-2005, 03:08 PM

Why did the banana cross the street?

bananalover · 08-04-2005, 03:11 PM

Why are bananas never lonely?
Because they hang around in bunches.

bananalover · 08-04-2005, 03:12 PM

Time flies like an arrow, but fruit flies like a banana.

MediaHound · 08-04-2005, 04:40 PM

Your luck is so bad, you bought a bunch of bananas and they were all empty.

bananalover · 08-05-2005, 09:03 PM

How do you catch King Kong?
Hang upside down and make a noise like a banana.

bananalover · 08-05-2005, 09:11 PM

Yes, I have no favorite banana joke, ... well, that's it, I split!

MediaHound · 08-08-2005, 08:08 PM

ok, here's an old rhyme I remember from childhood

I'm Chiquita banana and I'm here to say
if you wanna kill your teacher, there's a real easy way
just take a banana peel, and put it on the floor
and watch your teacher go flying out the door

JoeReal · 08-09-2005, 05:27 PM

knock knock. who's there? BANANA. Banana who?
repeat 5 times and end with:
knock knock. who's there? Orange. Orange who?
Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

MediaHound · 08-12-2005, 08:03 PM

Ali Muktar is in Iraq, starving, so he goes to the market to steal some food.
He sees Mohammed get busted for stealing peanuts,
and the secret police spread Mohammed eagle and shove the peanuts up his arse, the penalty.
Mohammed screams "No, Allah, Noooo...!".
Next he sees Rami busted for stealing apples,
and so the secret police push the apples up his butt. He bleeds from the eyeballs in pain.
Then he sees his schoolmate, Osama, get arrested for stealing bananas.
But as the push the bananas in his ass, he's hysterical laughing.
"How come you laughing, idiot infidel?" they ask.
"Wait 'till you catch Ali, he steals watermelons!"

Bananavilla · 08-14-2005, 08:05 PM

Not a banana joke in words, but funny non the less.
Mike

Jetstream · 09-13-2005, 08:40 PM

4 apples were standing on a street corner goofing off when a banana came by. The banana thought they looked like they were having fun, so he asked if he could join them. The one bad apple said, no banana, split...:>(...

...sorry, just made it up...Z

AnnaJW · 09-14-2005, 04:25 AM

OMG, MediaHound , I've been outside with my banana plants and have had the same song going through my head! I thought some kid here just made it up. LOL!!!

Casa Del Gatos · 09-14-2005, 06:20 AM

Two bananas are sunbathing on a riverbank when a turd comes floating by. He yells out "Come on in, the water's great!"
One banana looks at the other and says "Do you believe that shit?"

MediaHound · 09-14-2005, 10:06 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AnnaJW

OMG, MediaHound , I've been outside with my banana plants and have had the same song going through my head! I thought some kid here just made it up. LOL!!!

lol

07-10-2005, 10:35 PM	#1 (permalink)
MediaHound Tally-man MediaHound's Photo Gallery Location: South Florida Find me on the map! Zone: 10b Name: Jarred Join Date: Jul 2005 Posts: 4,062 BananaBucks : 57,485 Feedback: 58 / 100% Thanks: 975 Thanked 1,141 Times in 402 Posts Welcomes: 266	Banana Jokes! Q: Why do bananas wear suntan lotion? A: Because they peel!

08-12-2005, 08:03 PM	#14 (permalink)
MediaHound Tally-man MediaHound's Photo Gallery Location: South Florida Find me on the map! Zone: 10b Name: Jarred Join Date: Jul 2005 Posts: 4,062 BananaBucks : 57,485 Feedback: 58 / 100% Thanks: 975 Thanked 1,141 Times in 402 Posts Welcomes: 266	Re: Banana Jokes! Ali Muktar is in Iraq, starving, so he goes to the market to steal some food. He sees Mohammed get busted for stealing peanuts, and the secret police spread Mohammed eagle and shove the peanuts up his arse, the penalty. Mohammed screams "No, Allah, Noooo...!". Next he sees Rami busted for stealing apples, and so the secret police push the apples up his butt. He bleeds from the eyeballs in pain. Then he sees his schoolmate, Osama, get arrested for stealing bananas. But as the push the bananas in his ass, he's hysterical laughing. "How come you laughing, idiot infidel?" they ask. "Wait 'till you catch Ali, he steals watermelons!"

08-14-2005, 08:05 PM	#15 (permalink)
Bananavilla Senior Member Bananavilla's Photo Gallery Location: East Bay Area California Join Date: Aug 2005 Posts: 202 BananaBucks : 2,650 Feedback: 1 / 100% Thanks: 0 Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post Welcomes: 0	Re: Banana Jokes! Not a banana joke in words, but funny non the less. Mike

09-13-2005, 08:40 PM	#16 (permalink)
Jetstream Junior Member Join Date: Aug 2005 Posts: 18 BananaBucks : 606 Feedback: 0 / 0% Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts Welcomes: 0	Re: Banana Jokes! 4 apples were standing on a street corner goofing off when a banana came by. The banana thought they looked like they were having fun, so he asked if he could join them. The one bad apple said, no banana, split...:>(... ...sorry, just made it up...Z

09-14-2005, 04:25 AM	#17 (permalink)
AnnaJW AnnaJW's Photo Gallery Location: Riverside, CA Find me on the map! Zone: 9b Name: Anna Join Date: Jul 2005 Posts: 1,285 BananaBucks : 8,987 Feedback: 6 / 100% Thanks: 19 Thanked 42 Times in 27 Posts Welcomes: 1	Re: Banana Jokes! OMG, MediaHound , I've been outside with my banana plants and have had the same song going through my head! I thought some kid here just made it up. LOL!!! __________________ -Anna Banana - Living my life in MMORPG's

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07-20-2005, 11:32 AM	#2 (permalink)
JoeReal Senior Member JoeReal's Photo Gallery Location: Davis, California USDA zone 9 Find me on the map! Join Date: Jul 2005 Posts: 905 BananaBucks : 16,852 Feedback: 1 / 100% Thanks: 19 Thanked 124 Times in 85 Posts Welcomes: 2	Q: What is Beethoven's favorite fruit? A: (sing to the tune of 5th symphony): Banana..na....! Banana..na....! http://w3.rz-berlin.mpg.de/cmp/beethoven_sym5_1.wav

08-03-2005, 06:37 PM	#3 (permalink)
bananalover Senior Member bananalover's Photo Gallery Find me on the map! Join Date: Jul 2005 Posts: 186 BananaBucks : 2,014 Feedback: 0 / 0% Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts Welcomes: 0	What do you call two banana skins? A pair of slippers

08-04-2005, 02:52 PM	#4 (permalink)
JoeReal Senior Member JoeReal's Photo Gallery Location: Davis, California USDA zone 9 Find me on the map! Join Date: Jul 2005 Posts: 905 BananaBucks : 16,852 Feedback: 1 / 100% Thanks: 19 Thanked 124 Times in 85 Posts Welcomes: 2	Q: When banana growers are heart broken, what do they sing? A:What else but Peelings? Peelings, nothing more than peelings, trying to forget my peelings of love. Teardrops rolling down on my face, trying to forget my peelings of love.... Adapted from song of Morris Albert's Feelings.

08-04-2005, 02:54 PM	#5 (permalink)
JoeReal Senior Member JoeReal's Photo Gallery Location: Davis, California USDA zone 9 Find me on the map! Join Date: Jul 2005 Posts: 905 BananaBucks : 16,852 Feedback: 1 / 100% Thanks: 19 Thanked 124 Times in 85 Posts Welcomes: 2	Why did the banana go to see the doctor? The banana was not peeling very well.

08-04-2005, 03:08 PM	#6 (permalink)
MediaHound Tally-man MediaHound's Photo Gallery Location: South Florida Find me on the map! Zone: 10b Name: Jarred Join Date: Jul 2005 Posts: 4,062 BananaBucks : 57,485 Feedback: 58 / 100% Thanks: 975 Thanked 1,141 Times in 402 Posts Welcomes: 266	Why did the banana cross the street?

08-04-2005, 03:11 PM	#7 (permalink)
bananalover Senior Member bananalover's Photo Gallery Find me on the map! Join Date: Jul 2005 Posts: 186 BananaBucks : 2,014 Feedback: 0 / 0% Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts Welcomes: 0	Why are bananas never lonely? Because they hang around in bunches.

08-04-2005, 03:12 PM	#8 (permalink)
bananalover Senior Member bananalover's Photo Gallery Find me on the map! Join Date: Jul 2005 Posts: 186 BananaBucks : 2,014 Feedback: 0 / 0% Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts Welcomes: 0	Time flies like an arrow, but fruit flies like a banana.

08-04-2005, 04:40 PM	#9 (permalink)
MediaHound Tally-man MediaHound's Photo Gallery Location: South Florida Find me on the map! Zone: 10b Name: Jarred Join Date: Jul 2005 Posts: 4,062 BananaBucks : 57,485 Feedback: 58 / 100% Thanks: 975 Thanked 1,141 Times in 402 Posts Welcomes: 266	Your luck is so bad, you bought a bunch of bananas and they were all empty.

08-05-2005, 09:03 PM	#10 (permalink)
bananalover Senior Member bananalover's Photo Gallery Find me on the map! Join Date: Jul 2005 Posts: 186 BananaBucks : 2,014 Feedback: 0 / 0% Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts Welcomes: 0	How do you catch King Kong? Hang upside down and make a noise like a banana.

08-05-2005, 09:11 PM	#11 (permalink)
bananalover Senior Member bananalover's Photo Gallery Find me on the map! Join Date: Jul 2005 Posts: 186 BananaBucks : 2,014 Feedback: 0 / 0% Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts Welcomes: 0	Yes, I have no favorite banana joke, ... well, that's it, I split!

08-08-2005, 08:08 PM	#12 (permalink)
MediaHound Tally-man MediaHound's Photo Gallery Location: South Florida Find me on the map! Zone: 10b Name: Jarred Join Date: Jul 2005 Posts: 4,062 BananaBucks : 57,485 Feedback: 58 / 100% Thanks: 975 Thanked 1,141 Times in 402 Posts Welcomes: 266	ok, here's an old rhyme I remember from childhood I'm Chiquita banana and I'm here to say if you wanna kill your teacher, there's a real easy way just take a banana peel, and put it on the floor and watch your teacher go flying out the door

08-09-2005, 05:27 PM	#13 (permalink)
JoeReal Senior Member JoeReal's Photo Gallery Location: Davis, California USDA zone 9 Find me on the map! Join Date: Jul 2005 Posts: 905 BananaBucks : 16,852 Feedback: 1 / 100% Thanks: 19 Thanked 124 Times in 85 Posts Welcomes: 2	knock knock. who's there? BANANA. Banana who? repeat 5 times and end with: knock knock. who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

09-14-2005, 06:20 AM	#18 (permalink)
Casa Del Gatos Senior Member Casa Del Gatos's Photo Gallery Location: Silverhill, Alabama Join Date: Aug 2005 Posts: 103 BananaBucks : 1,042 Feedback: 0 / 0% Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts Welcomes: 0	Re: Banana Jokes! Two bananas are sunbathing on a riverbank when a turd comes floating by. He yells out "Come on in, the water's great!" One banana looks at the other and says "Do you believe that shit?"

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